BCCI ties up with Vivid Videos

by lunatic who feels he should not be taken seriously

March 27, 2007

After considerable analytical thinking, the BCCI president, Mr Sharad Pawar has come up with a plan to come up with a master plan to curb India's downfall in world cricket.
After being questioned on what the parent plan is, the BCCI president read out a prepared statement- " No ,I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky."

However he did let it slip through that Indian team would be divided into 2 - India Blue and India Senior. Mr Pawar has ofcourse the distinction of having the highest score of 22 not out in 122 matches in the neigbourhood gulli ka cricket. Mr Pawar, an avid pani puri lover not only because of the resemblance in shape, also let it slip that there was to be a tie up with the top producers in the porn industry - Vivid Videos. "Hence the tags- BLUE & SENIOR " Mr Pawar explained with a sly smile. It was obvious that it was he who came up with the names."

The coach of the senior team will be none other than Dilip Vengsarkar while the blue team will be coached by Saurav Ganguly, " he explained.
Dilip Vengsarkar had ofcourse proved he is quite capable of the task when he showed no qualms in exposing his white haired nipples to the world when India managed a draw from the point of certain victory back in South Africa.
Saurav ganguly had proved his mettle earlier when he let out a mating call to Andrew Flintoff,in England, who reciprocated when he came to India and both had an intense passionate night at BrokemyBack mountain.

The players are reported to be excited with this tie up.

"Now everyone can know why i am called the Little Master," a senior player quoted.

Ex-Indian captain Dravid solemnly said-"I take full responsibility of the loss,crashing the hopes of a billion, but we must move on, we must look forward" before adding with a cunning smile- "There are holes in my wall too."

Indian wicketkeeper MS Dhoni commented that he was waiting for a green signal from his god, Fido Dido, to make a commitment.But he did say he was excited to work with the likes of Jenna Jameson and co.
"Unhorny ban gaya horny,horny ban gaya dhoni."

Kerala super fast bowler S Sreeshanth was last seen practising talking to his privates,in full expectations, asking it to cool down, by motion of his hands.

Virender Sehwag was not able to get out of bedroom for comments because he was grounded. Sehwag ki Maa also added that it was unlikely he renew his contract.

Owner of Vivid Vidos, Paul Hirsch made a public statement, that this partnership would definitely move them forward in the business, and then back, and then forward, and then back, obviously sharing a very very poor joke.
He said he was excited to work with team India- Blue & Senior, but he was more excited with the aquiring of Mandira Bedi. "Now that is 1 girl the whole world wants shut up, I think it will be quite a challenge," Mr Hirsch commented.


Good Luck Mr Hirsch. Even Charu Sharma's head was not enough.

The one with the crickets and stuffs

Cricket is our sole religion. It is something we look at and feel proud. It is something(rather the only thing) we can show to the world as ours.

Is that the reason, everytime the men in blue steps into the ground, we expect nothing less than a win? We feel gross injustice has been served to us in the durbars of cricket lords.

Is that the reason Jharkand Mukti Morcha(JMM) has been vandalising Dhoni's unbuilt house for he proved to be nothing but a hollow caliber in our gods arsenal?

"If cricket is our religion, then BCCI must be our god. With gods like this, who needs devils?"

India is a decent team with some potentials but it is definitely not a world cup favorite. It is not of the same class as Australia, SA or even Sri Lanka as it was obvious India were beaten in every dept- bowling, batting, fielding and the number of goodlooking lady fans. The zest to win was more for the team from Colombo, there was more spark.

Build from this disappointment. Make a fresh team with fresh attitudes. One day cricket is all about attitude, attitude of Clarke & Ponting accelerating from the 30th over, attitude of Smith and De Villiers not fazed by the bowling attack or the massive target.
Bury the past. Dont make cricket a religion. Its not about luck or faith. Its about effort, will and passion.

Amit Varma quotes- "Now, isn’t it ironic that all this should be happening for sport? To me, sport is all about celebrating human endeavour. Perhaps this is best reflected in the fact that the team that invokes God the most was the first strong team to crash out of the World Cup. Divine intervention ain’t no good if you don’t walk the hard yards yourself: that’s one good lesson sport teaches."

I thank India for,
1) allowing me to complete my set of unread novels.
2) allowing me to sleep early at night.
3) allowing me to see Mandira Bedi cry.
4) punishing the Indian media for now they have to follow Bangaladesh's matches
5) punishing the advertisers who have lost so much...

I thank Ireland for,
1) lessening the pain.

Here is a random thought for helping out Tata Sky. They should arrange Indias tour of Pakistan for the Woolmer/Chapell Series- parallel to the world cup. Never a better way to regenerate cricket in the subcontinent.